Dear Baby Grace

***In the midst of everything, I realized I had this post saved in draft status and never posted it. Oops! So before I post our birth story, I thought I would go ahead and post this last letter to our baby before she was born. Stay tuned for how Miss Grace was brought into this world later this week***

Dear Baby Grace,

Tomorrow is the day we have been waiting for…we will be going to the hospital to meet you! Since it doesn’t seem like you are in a big hurry to make your way out before you get too big, the doctor is ready to get things rolling at 4:45 in the morning. I’m sure that it will be scary for both of us, but the end goal is to get you here safely and sometimes we need a push in the right direction. So we are going to induce labor in the morning to get Mommy’s body ready to help push you out!

I said a prayer the other night before our doctors appointment. I know that God is aware of what my body is capable of and that if he wanted you to come into this world naturally then I knew that my body would be able to get thru it, if it turned out that you were too big and we had to bring you into this world by c-section, then I was fine with that too. And at our appointment it was decided that we would try to get you here naturally.  So there is someone up there that knows how you are supposed to be born, and I’m just thankful to have a knowledgeable doctor who won’t push things too far if he thinks you are in danger.

I can’t wait to finally meet you tomorrow….we have been waiting a long time to hold you in our arms. Not just the 10 months that I carried you in my belly, but in the years that we waited to have you. I know that you will just be perfect. And I hope that I can make you the happiest baby ever! We are all new at this parenting thing, just like you are new at this baby thing. So please be patient with me while I learn your cues and get better at trying to predict what you are going to want or need before you try to tell me. I know it will get easier with time, but at first Mommy might be a little confused.

I apologize in advance for any screaming or crying that I may do tomorrow before you make your way out of my tummy. They tell me its gonna hurt more than anything that I can imagine, so I’m sure that its gonna take everything that I have to push thru it. But just remember…Mommy isn’t yelling at you. Its not your fault and I hope you don’t remember any of it if it stressful at all.  But you are so worth it and to be able to hold you and look into your eyes at the end of this amazing process is something that I was fearful that I would never get to experience. What a blessing we are about to receive!

But now its here…and your daddy and I can’t wait to meet you. Our little girl.

We are about to start an amazing journey together!

We love you to the moon and back! See you tomorrow sweetheart!

Dear Baby Girl

Dear Baby Girl,
Hello my sweet little girl! This weekend was Easter, as you can see by the picture of Mommy and Daddy below, Mommy looked like she was smuggling her own Easter Egg!  I can not believe that in just 6 and a half weeks, you will be here with us! I kept thinking of how cute you will be next year in your Easter Dress!

I got your daddy a little Easter Basket with some of his favorite candy, but was thinking the whole time about how fun it would be for both of us to make and hide your Easter Basket next year! I’m sure there will be a cute toy or stuffed animal and probably a book and maybe some little snacks for you. Although you will not have any idea what you are doing, you will probably participate in an Easter Egg hunt with your little cousins. This will be more for Mommy and Daddy to enjoy probably, but just humor us and act like you are having fun, mkay?

Your room is *almost* finished. The last piece should be completed by this weekend. We find ourselves sitting in that room so much already. Mommy sits in the glider, sometimes with Miss Emma on her ever-shrinking lap, and Daddy is on the floor laying with Miss Ellie. We either practice our lamaze breathing or talk about some of the things we need to get done in the next month before you arrive. Its such a calming room, I really hope that you feel safe and happy when you are in there like we do. 

As I sit in your room and rub my belly, I feel you move and push around.  I close my eyes take a deep breathe and smile. I smile for the little girl that will soon be playing on the carpet with Daddy. I smile for the little girl that I will be rocking to sleep in that chair. I smile for the hope and love that you have brought to our family, and can’t wait to have you here with us. Just 6 short weeks little one. Until then, keep growing and maturing….push and stretch wherever you need to. Mommy doesn’t mind at all…and it scares me when you are too calm. So keep on dancing! Daddy likes to watch and feel Mommy’s tummy move too, so be sure to move extra when you hear him close by!

Remember we adore you to the moon and back already!
Love,
Mommy and Daddy

Dear Baby Girl

Dear baby girl,

We passed the 23rd week yesterday! Can you believe there are only 4 months left that you will be in my tummy? That’s just 16 weekends until you will be in my arms! Sometimes it seems like its forever away and sometimes it seems like the time will just fly by! It’s awesome and I’m loving every minute of it! I hope you are comfortable in there, I’ve been trying to sit up straighter to give you room to stretch and grow, hopefully that’s working out for you.

Daddy took this picture of us last week, I am thinking of putting it in your nursery. I want you to always know that I have daydreamed of this phase of my life for so long, and now I still find myself daydreaming, but it has turned into daydreams about what kind of little person you will be as I rub my belly. Will you have blond curls like your father? Blue eyes like me? Will you giggle alot and be happy with the little things in life? Will your eyes light up when we walk in the room? I think all of these and so much more.

You started to do somersaults in my tummy this week, which has been an amazing feeling! Most of them can be felt either after breakfast or in the evenings when I’m lounging on the couch trying to stay warm in these single digit temps. I have to admit I wasn’t sure if you were moving around much since I had just felt little flutters for the last few weeks, but this week I could tell it was really you doing your little dance in there! Keep on dancing little one, I love to feel you are awake in there!

Oh and your crib arrived last week as did the conversion rails so that when you grow up we will have a fill size bed for you. Let me tell you, those rails looked soo long! I was like wow, one day I will have baby that needs a full size bed. Granted it will be YEARS from now, but still it was kinda eye opening to see the length of how big that bed would be.  I love it and I hope you will too…I can’t wait to get it put together this week!

Both sets of bedding arrived yesterday as well. Yes that’s right I said both. See your mommy is a tad bit indecisive (majorly if you ask your father) and wanted to order her top two favorites and see them in your room before she decided on which one would make you the happiest baby. I must admit, just seeing them in the package, I’m leaning towards the second one more and more. We’ll see how it looks when we get them on the crib for the big picture.

I find myself patting my tummy almost all the time, hope you can feel the love when I do that, cause you pop in my mind about every 3 minutes and I can’t wait for that next somersault! Keep growing and feel free to push or kick if you need more room, I’ll do my best to accommodate you!

Remember we adore you to the moon and back already!
Love,
Mommy

letter to babybug

Dear babybug:

I can’t believe I am almost half way thru this pregnancy already! Things going good from your side? I hope you are doing good in there and growing like a weed. I haven’t felt you move around too much yet, just kinda little flutters and vibrations. I’m hoping its just because Momma has an extra layer of fluff then all those skinny Momma’s out there that are already feeling external kicks. But we have heard your hearbeat several times and it is strong. We have to move the Doppler to follow you sometimes so I know you are on the move, even if I can’t feel it just yet. Keep up the good work, God is watching you and knows how quickly things should be happening. You are in a much more powerful set of hands and I am confident in his abilities.

This relationship that you and I have, its teaching me a lot about myself too. I tend to be, what some may call a control freak. I try to get all the details and am always trying to plan ahead to know what is happening. But with this, I don’t have that crystal ball to make sure things are ok. I just have to believe that they are. And I’m trying with all my heart to believe…I hope you are feeling that and not focusing on the random fears that pop into my head or dreams. Just breathe….and repeat.

Do you know what next week is? Its our next ultrasound! The BIG ultrasound! I know-it’s FINALLY here! We are now just 8 days away from finding out if you are a little boy bean or a little girl bean. I can not wait. I want to start calling you he or she instead of “it”, which I try not to do because you are not an “it”, you are a tiny human and deserve to be acknowledged as such. That’s why most of the time I refer to you as Bean or Bebe, just sounds so much better then “it”.

I’ve had a few dreams here and there about you, but have never been able to get a feeling if you were a boy or girl, just that you were healthy and part of our lives. I do know that I am focusing more on having boy names picked out and maybe its jut because we are 85% sure of the girl name but not on the boy name, so I am trying to come up with a list of both to choose from.

Maybe it’s the fact that I’ve wanted a girl for as long as I knew I wanted to be a mother, but lately have been feeling that little boys are so cute and sweet and wouldn’t be any less adorable then a little girl. It would just be cute little khakis and polos instead of bows and tutus. I just don’t want to get into the ultrasound and have them say what you are and make you feel like I was disappointed. So if you are a boy, that is perfectly fine and I will be thrilled just as much as if you were a girl. Seriously….I know it sounds so cliché, but as long as you are healthy and we both come out of delivery fine, that will be the biggest blessing of all.

Either way I can’t wait to meet you! Eek…I can’t wait to see your little fingers and toes and nose…you are gonna be so cute! But until June comes, I will be happy getting to see you move around next week on that screen and show us what God gave you. They say to drink orange juice before to get you moving so I might need to pick some up on the way down. So if you can, work with me next week and start wiggling around about 9am on Tuesday. I’m sure I’ll remind you a dozen times until then.

I am feeling much better lately, you haven’t made me quesy much anymore and now only encounter heartburn just before bed a few nights a week so that’s much better then feeling it a few times a day. So thank you for that. Oh and I was surprised that you prefer the lime sherbet the best out the rainbow box. Maybe next time I’ll just get that for ya! The cravings for salads are a good thing, don’t mind them at all either. You know, maybe green is going to be your favorite color.

Sorry if I’m jostling you all about in the middle of the night, just trying to get into the best spot for both of us to get some zzz’s. And yeah about the getting up 3 times a night to use the bathroom, that’s not all your fault little one. I’ve always had a small bladder so I’m kinda used to it anyway. Well at least once a night. But its ok, no biggie. Glad to do it.

This week me and your father have our first childbirth class, just to go over some baby basics. It’s been a while since your dad has been around a baby, it’s been almost 17 years since your Uncle Kyle was born. So except for a few friends babies that we’ve been around, its kinda new to him. And as you know, you are my first, so am soaking up everything that I can that will help me be a better mommy to you.

So just keep doing what you are doing, and if you need more of anything to make your stay in uterus a little more enjoyable, please feel free to suck whatever you need from me. I will try to keep the nutrients and fluids coming.

Remember we adore you to the moon and back already!
Love,
Mommy